A Letter of Complaint in a Foreign Language
A student must write a formal letter in English (as the foreign language) to a hotel complaining about a stay. The facts: booked a double room for three nights at 120 EUR per night; on arrival was given a single room; the air conditioning failed on the second night; the hotel offered a free breakfast as compensation, which the student accepted. The task requires a formal register, a clear statement of the problem, a specific request, and no more than 180 words. The student's draft opens 'Hey, so basically your hotel was terrible' and demands a full refund of all three nights. It is 240 words long. The rubric rewards appropriate register, a clear and proportionate request, and staying within the word limit.
1. Identify the three biggest problems with the draft and explain how each affects the rubric.
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First, register: 'Hey, so basically' is informal and unsuitable for a formal complaint; the rubric rewards formal register, so this loses marks immediately. Second, the request is disproportionate: a full refund of all three nights ignores that the student accepted breakfast compensation and that two nights were otherwise acceptable; the rubric rewards a clear and proportionate request, and an excessive demand weakens credibility. Third, length: 240 words exceeds the 180-word limit, which is a direct rubric penalty and also signals an inability to select relevant information. A fourth, smaller issue is that the draft does not state the facts precisely (room type, dates, the air-conditioning failure), which weakens the complaint's evidential basis.
2. Write a revised opening of two or three sentences that fixes the register and states the problem precisely.
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Possible revision: 'I am writing to complain about my stay at your hotel from 3 to 6 May, which fell short of the standard I booked. Although I had reserved a double room at 120 EUR per night, I was given a single room on arrival, and the air conditioning failed on the second night.' This is formal ('I am writing to complain'), precise (dates, room type, price, specific fault) and concise. It avoids the informal opener and the vague 'terrible', and it sets up a proportionate request in the next paragraph. It also implicitly acknowledges the facts the hotel will check, which makes the complaint credible.
3. Propose a proportionate request and explain the reasoning, given that breakfast compensation was accepted.
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A proportionate request would be a partial refund reflecting the difference between the single and double room rate for the nights affected, plus an acknowledgement of the air-conditioning failure, rather than a full refund. Reasoning: the student accepted breakfast as compensation, which weakens a claim for the whole stay; two nights were otherwise satisfactory; and the measurable loss is the room-type difference. Asking for the difference is specific, calculable and defensible, which is what the rubric rewards. A full refund would appear opportunistic and could invite the hotel to reject the entire complaint, leaving the student with nothing.