Two Reasons, One Paragraph, Ninety Words
Writing section, 25 minutes, one prompt: "Some people think all high school students should be required to join a school club. Do you agree with this idea?" The answer must be 80–100 words with two reasons. A student writes these notes in four minutes: (a) clubs teach students to work with people they did not choose; (b) my friend joined the tennis club and made three friends; (c) some clubs cost money for uniforms and travel; (d) third-year students already study four hours a night for entrance exams. She plans to agree and use (b) and (d) because they feel "more real" than (a). She writes 62 words in the first 12 minutes, then counts them twice, losing four minutes. Her sentence "Clubs are good because they are good for students" is still in the draft.
1. Which two notes should she use, and why is her planned pair a problem?
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The note set is lopsided, and that is the real problem. For "agree," the only usable note is (a): it is general, it names a mechanism (working with people you did not choose), and it can be explained in one sentence. Note (b) is one friend's experience - it illustrates (a) but cannot stand as a separate reason; examiners read it as an example, not an argument. Notes (c) and (d) both point the other way: cost, and students already overloaded.
So her plan - agree, using (b) and (d) - puts one weak reason and one contradictory reason on the same side. That essay cannot score well on content however good the English is.
Two repairs:
- Switch to disagree and use (c) + (d). Cost and time are distinct, general, and both follow from the word "required" applying to all students.
- Stay with agree and use (a) plus a second reason she generates herself, e.g. clubs give students a regular place to belong, or let them work with teachers outside class.
Decide within the first three minutes; do not spend ten minutes choosing a side.
2. She has written 62 words. Show how to reach 80–100 words without padding or repetition.
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Sixty-two words is short because the reasons are named but not developed. Padding - repeating the prompt, adding "I think" - is visible and earns nothing. Grow the content instead:
- Add a because-chain. For each reason, write reason → why it matters → result. "Clubs teach teamwork, because students must divide jobs with people they did not choose; this is a skill they will need at work."
- Add one concrete but general example with a number or a group, not a named friend: "a class of thirty may contain only two students who already know each other."
- Add a short closing sentence that answers "so what": "For these two reasons, I believe clubs should be required."
Word budget for 80–100: about 15 for the position sentence, 30–35 per reason, 10 for the close. That lands at 85–95, safely inside the limit.
Time budget for 25 minutes: 3 planning, 14 writing, 3 counting and editing, 5 checking spelling and verb forms. Counting twice in the middle is what cost her four minutes.
3. Rewrite "Clubs are good because they are good for students" and give a checklist she can apply to every sentence in the editing pass.
Read the worked answer
The sentence is circular - the reason repeats the claim. The reader learns nothing, and roughly twelve words are wasted.
Diagnosis: the because-clause must add a new idea, not a synonym.
Rewrites (any of these works):
- "Clubs are valuable because students learn to cooperate with people outside their usual group."
- "Joining a club helps students because it gives them a regular activity that is not studying."
- "Required clubs are useful because they let teachers see students in a different setting."
Checklist for every sentence:
- Does the because-clause say something the main clause did not?
- Is the subject doing a real action?
- Would the sentence still be true if you deleted "good" or "important"? If not, the sentence was empty.
Fix sentences like this in the editing pass, not while writing - stopping to polish mid-draft is what produces a 62-word answer.