Fixing Modifiers and Pronoun Reference in a Research Summary
A student is combining sentences for a research summary: “Walking through the museum, the dinosaur skeleton impressed the students.” Another pair: “The exhibit was fascinating. It included a fossilized egg.” A third sentence: “The students told their teacher that they had never seen anything like it.” The teacher’s notes say to avoid dangling modifiers, use precise pronoun reference, and combine short sentences only when the relationship between ideas is clear. The summary must be 60–80 words and use academic tone. The student has already written 55 words, leaving room for one combined sentence. The fossilized egg was found in Montana in 2010.
1. Fix the dangling modifier in the first sentence.
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The modifier “Walking through the museum” must describe the subject of the main clause. In the original, the skeleton appears to be walking. Revise: “Walking through the museum, the students were impressed by the dinosaur skeleton.” Now the students are the ones walking. If the writer wants to keep “the skeleton” as the subject, the opening phrase must be changed: “As the students walked through the museum, the dinosaur skeleton impressed them.” Either revision removes the dangling modifier; the first is more concise.
2. Combine “The exhibit was fascinating. It included a fossilized egg.” into one sentence with a clear relationship, using the Montana detail if helpful.
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Combine with a relative clause: “The exhibit, which included a fossilized egg, was fascinating.” This keeps “fascinating” as the main judgment and treats the egg as a detail. Alternatively: “The fascinating exhibit included a fossilized egg found in Montana in 2010.” The second version folds in the extra fact and uses a precise modifier. Avoid “The exhibit was fascinating, it included a fossilized egg,” which creates a comma splice, and avoid “The exhibit was fascinating because it included a fossilized egg” unless the writer actually means the egg caused the fascination.
3. What is the pronoun-reference problem in “never seen anything like it,” and how should the sentence be revised?
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The pronoun “it” in “never seen anything like it” has no clear antecedent: it could refer to the exhibit, the skeleton, or the egg. Revise with a precise noun: “The students told their teacher they had never seen such an exhibit.” If the intended referent is the skeleton, say “such a skeleton.” The revision also keeps the academic tone and avoids repeating “it” after “anything like.” The pronoun “they” is acceptable because its antecedent, “students,” is clear and close.