Notice and Formal Letter on a Changed School-Bus Timing
St. Xavier's Higher Secondary School has 42 students who board bus TN-45 from the Gandhi Nagar stop. From 15 July the corporation has advanced the morning pickup from 7:15 to 6:50 a.m. without informing the school. On 8 July, three of these students reached late and missed the first-period unit test; two now walk 1.2 km in the dark to the next stop. The Principal asks you, the Students' Council Secretary, to do two things by Monday: put a notice on the board (not more than 50 words) and send a formal letter to the Depot Manager, Metropolitan Transport Corporation, requesting either the old timing or an additional 7:15 trip. The letter must carry the Principal's countersignature, may not exceed 150 words, and must not sound like a complaint from children. An earlier draft contained this sentence: 'Neither the students nor the driver were informed about the change, and the timings has not been display at the stop.'
1. Draft the notice in 50 words or fewer. Then name two things you deliberately left out and explain what would have gone wrong if you had included them.
Read the worked answer
NOTICE St. Xavier's HSS - Students' Council 10 July 20XX BUS TN-45, GANDHI NAGAR STOP The 7:15 a.m. pickup moves to 6:50 a.m. from 15 July. The 42 affected students must meet the transport coordinator at the portico during break on 12 July with their bus passes. Secretary, Students' Council (47 words)
Left out, deliberately:
- The grievance - the missed unit test and the 1.2 km walk. A notice exists to inform and to instruct; the moment it argues, it stops being read and starts being quoted as a complaint. The grievance belongs in the letter, where an officer with power to act will read it.
- The request to restore 7:15 - the board cannot restore a timing, and putting the request on the notice sets the Council up to look ineffective when nothing changes. The notice tells students what to do this week; the letter asks for the change.
Keeping the notice to one action - come to the portico on 12 July - is what makes it useful.
2. Write the letter (150 words maximum) and identify the three formal features you relied on to keep the tone firm but not childish.
Read the worked answer
To The Depot Manager Metropolitan Transport Corporation Anna Nagar Depot
10 July 20XX
Sir/Madam,
Sub: Request regarding morning pickup time of bus TN-45 at Gandhi Nagar stop
From 15 July, the pickup for bus TN-45 has been advanced from 7:15 to 6:50 a.m. without any intimation to this school. Forty-two of our students use this stop; three missed a scheduled unit test on 8 July, and two now walk 1.2 km in the dark to the next stop, which raises a safety concern we cannot ignore.
We request either the restoration of the 7:15 a.m. timing or an additional trip at 7:15 a.m. for this route. Our transport coordinator is available at the school office on any working day to discuss the load on this route.
Yours faithfully, [Name], Secretary, Students' Council Countersigned: Principal
Features that carry the tone: the subject line, which tells the officer what the letter is about before he reads a word; numbered facts (42, three, 1.2 km) in place of adjectives such as 'very unfair'; and an offer of cooperation rather than a threat, which gives the officer something to accept.
3. Correct the earlier draft sentence - 'Neither the students nor the driver were informed about the change, and the timings has not been display at the stop' - and justify each correction, including one where usage is genuinely disputed.
Read the worked answer
Corrected: 'Neither the students nor the driver was informed about the change, and the timings have not been displayed at the stop.'
1. was, not were. With 'neither ... nor', the verb agrees with the subject nearest to it; the nearest subject is 'the driver' (singular), so 'was'. This is the form almost every Indian school grammar key expects, though plural agreement is common in speech. In an examination, write 'was' and, if asked to justify, name the nearest-subject rule rather than saying 'it sounds better'.
2. have, not has. The subject 'timings' is plural; the verb in the present perfect must agree: 'timings have'.
3. displayed, not display. The sentence needs the past participle for the passive 'have been displayed'; the bare infinitive 'display' has no subject of its own and leaves the sentence ungrammatical.
Note that the meaning is untouched by all three corrections - which is the test of a grammar edit: fix the machine, leave the message alone.