Writing Portfolio: A Formal Email and a KakaoTalk Message
For the writing portfolio, a Level 3 student must produce two texts in 45 minutes: (1) a formal email of 180–220 Korean words to a teacher at a partner school in Suwon, asking to move a video call from Friday 10 a.m. KST to the following week because her class trip has been rescheduled; and (2) a 40–60 word KakaoTalk message to the Korean student who coordinates the call, apologising for a three-day delay in replying. The teacher’s original email used “-습니다” style and ended with “답장 기다리겠습니다.” The student’s first draft opens: “선생님, 우리 금요일에 못 해요. 다음 주로 바꿔 주세요.” She has a dictionary but no translator. The assessment schedule rewards consistent register, appropriate indirectness, and accurate honorific verbs.
1. Rewrite the opening sentence and explain at least three changes, linking each to the relationship between writer and reader.
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Rewrite: “선생님, 안녕하세요. 뉴질랜드 ○○고등학교의 ○○○입니다. 다름이 아니라 다음 주 금요일로 예정된 화상 수업 시간을 조정하고자 연락드렸습니다. 죄송하지만, 같은 주에 학교 체험 학습이 잡혀서 그날은 참석이 어려울 것 같습니다. 혹시 다음 주 수요일이나 목요일 오전 열 시는 어떠신지 여쭤봐도 될까요?” Changes: (1) “우리” becomes “저희/제” and the writer adds school and name, because the reader does not know her; (2) “못 해요” becomes “어려울 것 같습니다”, because blunt inability sounds like refusal of the teacher’s plan; (3) “바꿔 주세요” becomes “혹시 … 어떠신지 여쭤봐도 될까요?”, an indirect request that gives the teacher room to decline; (4) a reason and “죄송하지만” are added. Each change raises the hearer and lowers the speaker, which is the core of Korean formal politeness.
2. How should the KakaoTalk message differ from the email in grammar and vocabulary? Give a model sentence and justify it.
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Model: “○○야, 미안! 답장이 너무 늦었지? 지난주에 시험이랑 학교 행사 때문에 정신이 없었어. 선생님께도 메일 드렸는데, 다음 주로 화상 수업 날짜를 바꿀 수 있을까? 네가 괜찮은 날 알려 줘. 고마워!” Differences: 반말 (“야”, “늦었지”, “정신이 없었어”), direct apology “미안”, shorter turns, and no “드리다” or “여쭤보다”. The peer relationship is symmetrical, so “-습니다” would feel cold or sarcastic. The email uses “죄송합니다” and “여쭤보다” because the teacher is superior. Same content, different power geometry. A strong answer names the endings (-어/아, -지, -을까) and the lexical choices, not just “casual”. It should also note that the KakaoTalk message still refers to the teacher with “선생님께”, showing that the peer chat does not erase the school hierarchy.
3. The student wants to explain the reason (the school trip). Should she include it? Why, and how does Korean politeness affect the placement of the reason?
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Yes, include it, but place it after the apology and before the request, and keep it brief: “갑자기 학교 체험 학습이 잡혀서…”. In Korean formal writing, a reason without an apology can read as an excuse; an apology without a reason can read as unreliable. The sequence “죄송합니다 → 사정 설명 → 대안 제시 → 재차 사과” protects the teacher’s face and shows planning. Avoid over-explaining, such as a whole paragraph about the trip, because it can sound like special pleading. If the reason is sensitive, use “사정이 생겨서” rather than detail. The judgement tested is rhetorical ordering under politeness constraints: the same information placed before the apology would change the reader’s sense of whether the writer is sorry or merely informing.