Revising a Persuasive Letter for a Principal
Priya, a Grade 6 student, has written a 240-word persuasive letter to Principal Gallant asking for a 15-minute choice-reading block every Friday. Her letter begins 'Dear Principal, I think everyone wants this' and then lists three reasons in one long paragraph. She writes that 'reading is the most important subject' and that the block 'won't take away from anything.' Her best evidence is a class survey: 18 of 25 classmates said they would use the block. The survey did not ask whether students already read at home or whether they would give up another activity. The principal has said she is concerned about lost math instructional time and supervision on Fridays. Priya's teacher says the letter has a clear opinion but needs revision for a busy principal who must answer many requests. Priya has one afternoon to revise before the letter is sent.
1. What are the two most important revisions Priya should make before sending the letter? Explain how each revision would strengthen her argument for this audience.
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Two priorities are (1) replace absolute claims with accurate, audience-aware evidence and (2) add a brief counterargument that answers the principal's stated concerns. 'Everyone wants this' and 'reading is the most important subject' invite disagreement and do not help a busy principal decide. Priya should state the request in the first sentence, use the survey accurately-18 of 25 classmates said they would use the block-and admit the survey's limit. Because the principal is worried about math time and supervision, Priya should explain how the block would work without taking math time, such as using the existing Friday silent-reading period and having a teacher supervise. Organizing the letter into short paragraphs with a clear request, evidence, counterargument, and polite closing would make it easier to read and answer.
2. Rewrite Priya's evidence sentence so it is accurate and persuasive. Include the survey result and one limitation.
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In a survey of 25 classmates, 18 said they would use a 15-minute Friday choice-reading block. Because the survey did not ask whether students already read at home or what they would give up, the result shows interest in the idea, not proof that students would read more overall. This is more persuasive to a principal than 'everyone wants this' because it is exact and does not overclaim. It still supports the request: almost three quarters of the class said they would use the time. Priya could add a next step, such as trying the block for four Fridays and reviewing attendance or reading logs.
3. Write a short paragraph Priya could add to respond to the principal's concern about lost math time. Use a respectful tone and one practical condition.
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Dear Principal Gallant, I understand that math instructional time is limited. The choice-reading block would replace the current Friday silent-reading period rather than add a new period, so math time would not be reduced. A teacher could supervise the classroom while students read independently, and the class could try the block for four Fridays and then review whether students used the time. If the trial shows poor use, we would not continue it. This paragraph is respectful because it names the principal's concern, offers a concrete condition, and does not pretend the concern does not exist. It also gives the principal a low-risk way to say yes.