Writing Part 1: the email with a vague answer
Leo, 12, is doing Writing in a timed mock. He has 45 minutes for two parts. He spends 27 minutes on Part 2, a story, because he enjoys it and writes 130 words. That leaves 18 minutes for Part 1. The task is an email to his English friend Sam. Sam's email says: 'I'm going to the school science fair on Saturday. Can you come? What time shall we meet? Which exhibit do you want to see first? Shall I bring my camera?' The rubric has four notes: invite/accept, time, exhibit, camera. Leo writes 150 words. He answers the time ('at 10') and the camera ('yes, good idea'), but for the exhibit he writes 'I like all the exhibits, especially the robots and the space one.' He includes a long description of his cousin's science project that Sam did not ask about. He writes 'Hi Sam' and 'See you soon, Leo'. With three minutes left he notices the word limit and the vague exhibit answer.
1. Leo has three minutes and cannot rewrite everything. Rank what he should change, and justify the order using how Part 1 is marked.
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Rank by mark impact, not by how annoying the error is. Part 1 is marked on Content, Communicative Achievement, Organisation and Language. The vague exhibit answer damages Content because one of the four notes is not properly answered; that is the first fix. The 50 extra words and the cousin paragraph also damage Content (irrelevant material) and make the email less appropriate, so cutting them is second. Small grammar slips are last because they affect Language only, and three minutes is not enough to hunt them safely. A fast fix: replace 'I like all the exhibits, especially the robots and the space one' with 'The robots first - the space one gets crowded.' That answers 'which... first' with a clear choice and a reason, and saves words.
2. Draft replacement sentences for the exhibit note and one cut, keeping the email at about 100 words. Explain your word-count arithmetic.
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Replacement: 'The robots first - the space one gets crowded.' (8 words) replaces 12 words, saving 4 and answering the note. Cut the cousin sentence (16 words) and 'It's easy to find the hall, don't worry.' (8 words). That is 150 − 4 − 16 − 8 = 122. To get closer to 100, cut 'I'm really excited about Saturday' (5) → 117, which is within 'about 100' for B1. Keep the greetings: they cost 5 words and do real work. Do the counting after the content is complete, not before: cutting first can remove a note. The replacement is shorter and clearer because 'first' answers the exact question word, while 'especially' only lists favourites.
3. Leo wrote 'Hi Sam' and 'See you soon'. Are these appropriate? What would make the email more appropriate for an English friend, and what should he not do?
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'Hi Sam' and 'See you soon, Leo' are appropriate: the email is to a friend, so informal opening and closing are correct. The register should stay informal throughout - contractions ('I'd', 'it's'), direct questions and simple reactions are suitable. What would improve it is a question back to Sam, e.g. 'Shall we meet at the gate at 10?' or 'What time are you getting there?' because Part 1 is a reply and interaction, not a report. He should not switch into formal phrases such as 'Dear Sam, I am writing to inform you...' and should not use text spelling ('u', 'c u', 'pls'), which is inappropriate in an exam email even to a friend. Also, 'at 10' is acceptable informally but 'at 10 o'clock' is clearer; clarity beats showing off.