The Note in the Notebook
Ravi, 14, Class IX, joined the EMRS in July from a village 70 km away and is the first in his family to study outside the block. Since the mid-term test he has become silent, sits alone at meals, and his first-period teacher reports he sleeps in class. Last night a dormitory mate brought the warden a torn page from Ravi's notebook with the line 'koi fayda nahi, main yahan kyun hoon' and said Ravi had given away his favourite cap and his wristwatch to two juniors. Ravi's father works in a city and does not answer calls; his mother speaks only the local language. The school counsellor visits on Thursdays; today is Monday. When the warden asked casually in the corridor, Ravi shrugged and said he was 'just tired'. He has no disciplinary record and no previous counselling referral.
1. How would you distinguish ordinary homesickness from a mental-health risk here, and what questions would you actually ask?
Read the worked answer
Distinguish by pattern, function and intent.
- Homesickness is situational: it worsens after holidays or phone calls home, improves with engagement, friends and contact, and does not stop a child eating and sleeping for weeks.
- Risk is shown by duration, loss of function and signals of finality: four weeks of withdrawal, disturbed sleep and appetite, loss of interest, and - critically here - giving away possessions and a note expressing pointlessness. Giving away a watch and a favourite cap is farewell behaviour, not tidiness.
Ask privately, in his own language if possible, in plain words:
- 'How long have you been feeling like this?'
- 'Is there anything you were looking forward to?' (assessing anhedonia)
- 'Sometimes when people feel like this, they think about not being alive. Have you had thoughts like that?' Asking does not plant the idea - it opens the door.
- 'Have you thought about how or when? Have you ever tried?' (plan and intent)
- 'Is anyone troubling you - seniors, or at home?' (bullying, abuse, family illness or debt).
Record what he says in his own words. Do not promise secrecy you cannot keep.
2. What should happen between Monday and Tuesday, and where does confidentiality end?
Read the worked answer
Monday, same day
- Do not send him to the dormitory alone or leave him unsupervised; assign a trusted teacher or matron to stay near him discreetly.
- Remove access to means (sharps, stored medicines) from the immediate room without making a display of it.
- Inform the principal the same evening - this is a need-to-know safety matter, not gossip.
- Arrange a tele-consultation with the counsellor or a mental-health helpline (Tele-MANAS 14416) today; waiting for Thursday is a choice, not a necessity.
Tuesday
- Contact the mother through a teacher who speaks her language; describe behaviour, not labels.
- Put in place a buddy, a small responsibility and a changed seat - practical reconnection beats a lecture.
- Fix a review date and a written safety plan.
Confidentiality ends where there is risk to life, risk of harm to others, or abuse. Even then, share only what is needed, with the principal and the counsellor, and tell Ravi who you told and why - that preserves the trust you will need next week.
3. How should the family and teachers be involved without stigmatising Ravi?
Read the worked answer
Family: the first contact should not be a summons. The mother should hear 'Ravi is not eating or sleeping well and we are worried about his health', not 'your son is mentally ill'. Explain what the school is doing, ask about illness or money problems at home, and fix a date for the next call. If the father is unreachable, record the attempts; do not let the absence of one parent delay care.
Teachers: brief only those who teach or supervise him, with one consistent line - 'he is going through a hard time; be firm but kind, don't discuss him in class'. Ask them to watch sleep, appetite and any further giving away of things, and to report changes rather than counsel on their own.
Students: do not make him an example, a project or a rumour. A buddy from his own village or language group is the single most effective intervention in a residential school.
Reasoning: stigma in a closed hostel travels faster than any infection. The aim is to restore belonging and keep a watchful, ordinary routine - not to convert one boy's distress into the hostel's public story.