Ten-Mark Formal Application Marked for Register, Format, and Word Limit
Class X pre-board composition paper, 10 marks: 'Write an application to the Headmaster requesting waiver of the library fine for late return of a book.' One girl writes the date, sender's address, and subject correctly, but opens with 'ପ୍ରିୟ ବନ୍ଧୁ' and closes with 'ତୁମର ବନ୍ଧୁ'. Her body names the book, gives the number of late days (12), explains that illness caused the delay, and asks for waiver; the language is mostly correct with two spelling slips. She writes 170 words against a 150-word limit. Of 28 scripts, 11 make the same salutation error. The marking scheme is format 3, content 4, language 3, with no stated word-limit penalty. The teacher must decide the format score, whether the 20-word overrun costs anything, and which two corrections will most improve this script without rewriting it for her.
1. Award the format mark out of 3 and justify each component. Is 'ପ୍ରିୟ ବନ୍ଧୁ' merely a small slip?
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Award 2/3. Use a three-part format rubric: (a) sender's address and date-1; (b) receiver's address/designation and subject-1; (c) salutation, complimentary close, and signature-1. The girl earns (a) and (b), because the date, address, and subject are correct and the application is addressed to the Headmaster in the body. She loses (c): 'ପ୍ରିୟ ବନ୍ଧୁ' and 'ତୁମର ବନ୍ଧୁ' turn a formal application into a friendly letter. This is not a minor slip; salutation and close are the clearest signals of register, and 11 of 28 scripts make the same error, so the mark must teach it. Do not award 3/3 for 'all information present'-format is a separate criterion. Do not award 1/3 either, because two of the three format clusters are correct. Record 'wrong register in salutation/close' so the whole class gets the same correction.
2. The script is 20 words over the 150-word limit and has two spelling slips. Decide the total out of 10 and explain how you avoid double penalising.
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Total 8/10: format 2, content 4, language 2. Content is full-book named, 12 late days, illness explanation, waiver request-so 4. Language loses 1 for two spelling slips, not for the overrun. The 20-word overrun costs nothing because the scheme states no length penalty and the extra words do not add irrelevant matter; they likely elaborate the illness. If the overrun had introduced repetition or a new request, I would reduce content, not add a separate length deduction. This avoids double penalising: the same extra words cannot cost both content and length. If the school wants a length rule, it must be published before the exam and applied to all scripts. For this paper, write 'trim 20 words in revision' as feedback, not as a mark. The total is defensible: 2 + 4 + 2 = 8, with each deduction tied to a stated criterion.
3. Give the two corrections that most improve this script, each as a before/after pair, without rewriting the whole letter.
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Correction 1-salutation/close. Before: 'ପ୍ରିୟ ବନ୍ଧୁ ... ତୁମର ବନ୍ଧୁ'. After: 'ସେବାରେ, ପ୍ରଧାନଶିକ୍ଷକ ମହାଶୟ ... ଆପଣଙ୍କ ଅନୁଗତ ଛାତ୍ରୀ'. This fixes the register in two lines and preserves her body. Correction 2-one spelling slip in the book title or 'ଜରିମାନା'. Before: the misspelt form; after: the correct form, with a one-line rule (e.g., 'ଜରିମାନା' has ର after ଜ). Do not rewrite her request sentence; it is already clear. The two corrections target the highest-value format cluster and the language criterion, and they are transferable to the next formal letter. For the 11 similar scripts, put the salutation/close pair on the board and let students copy it; that is faster and more consistent than individual rewrites.