Formal Letter with a Register Trap
A BGCSE French writing task asks you to write a letter of about 90–100 words to a hotel manager complaining that your room was noisy and the shower was broken, and requesting a partial refund. You began: « Salut ! J'ai pas aimé ma chambre, c'était trop nul. Tu peux me rembourser ? » You have 20 minutes and must also include one past-tense description and one polite request. Your teacher has stressed accuracy and appropriate register.
1. Identify the problems with the opening and rewrite it appropriately.
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The opening uses informal register (Salut, Tu) for a formal complaint to a manager, and J'ai pas drops the ne of negation. A suitable opening: « Madame, Monsieur, je vous écris pour me plaindre de mon séjour dans votre hôtel. » Use vous throughout, keep a neutral tone, and reserve complaints for factual statements (la chambre était bruyante ; la douche ne fonctionnait pas). Register is assessed, so a single Salut can cost marks even if the grammar is otherwise correct.
2. How would you ensure you meet the content and length requirements without padding?
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Plan three short paragraphs: (1) reason for writing, (2) the two problems with a past-tense description (la nuit, il y avait beaucoup de bruit ; la douche était cassée), (3) polite request for a partial refund (Je vous serais reconnaissant de bien vouloir m'accorder un remboursement partiel). Count words roughly as you write; 90–100 words is about 8–10 short sentences. Avoid repeating the same complaint to reach the count - add relevant detail (dates, room number) instead. Check verbs and agreements in the final two minutes.