Editing a Failed-Transaction Email Before It Goes to 4,200 Customers
The branch is about to email 4,200 customers whose UPI payments failed on 14 March. The draft reads: 'Subject: Regarding your transaction that has not been processed. Dear Customer, We are sorry to inform you that your transaction of ₹9,999 has failed due to technical reason. Your account has been debited and the amount will be reversed within 5–7 working days. As per our records, the beneficiary account was not credited. We request you to kindly not worry and wait patiently. If the amount is not credited, please visit the branch with your passbook and Aadhaar. Please note that the bank is not responsible for any delay caused by the payment network.' A reconciliation report shows that 380 of the 4,200 transactions were already auto-reversed two days ago, and another 90 are under dispute because the beneficiary claims credit. The communications head wants to send the draft unchanged, arguing that most customers will not read it closely.
1. Identify three defects that make the draft unsafe for a mass send, citing evidence from the setup.
Read the worked answer
1. It makes a false blanket statement about reversal. The draft tells all 4,200 customers that the amount 'will be reversed within 5–7 working days', but 380 transactions were already auto-reversed two days ago. Sending the same text to those customers creates a written inaccuracy and may generate unnecessary queries.
2. It pre-judges disputed cases. Another 90 transactions are under dispute because the beneficiary claims credit. The draft asserts that 'the beneficiary account was not credited', which may be untrue for some of those cases. A mass email must not state a disputed fact as final.
3. The tone and call to action are poor. 'Kindly not worry and wait patiently' is patronising, and 'the bank is not responsible for any delay caused by the payment network' reads as a pre-emptive disclaimer before the bank has investigated. Directing every customer to visit the branch with passbook and Aadhaar will create avoidable footfall when a phone or online reference route would do. There is also a grammar slip: 'due to technical reason' needs an article or plural.
2. Rewrite the email in 80–100 words, preserving the facts the branch can stand behind and using a neutral, accountable tone.
Read the worked answer
Subject: Update on your UPI payment of 14 March
Dear Customer,
We are writing about your UPI payment of ₹9,999 on 14 March, which did not go through. We are sorry for the inconvenience. Your account was debited, and the amount is being reversed. Some reversals are already complete; remaining eligible cases will be processed within 5–7 working days. If your payment still shows as debited after that period, or if you have already received a credit, please contact us at [branch number] with your reference number. We will investigate promptly and keep you updated.
[Branch name]
(97 words.)
3. Advise the communications head on whether to send the original draft, with a risk-based justification.
Read the worked answer
Do not send the original draft unchanged. The risk is not mainly that customers will ignore it; it is that the email creates a single written record that is wrong for at least 470 customers-380 already reversed and 90 disputed. That can produce complaints, damage trust, and weaken the bank's position in disputed chargebacks.
The proportionate action is a 24-hour hold to segment the list into three groups: (i) customers already auto-reversed-send a short confirmation; (ii) customers still awaiting reversal-send the corrected status email with the reference route; (iii) disputed cases-route to a case manager and do not send a mass message. The communications head's argument that 'most customers will not read it closely' is not a control; the customers who do read it are exactly the ones likely to escalate.