Rewriting a vague and defensive public shutdown notice
The Executive Engineer of a city distribution division must issue a public notice about a planned shutdown. The draft prepared by a junior assistant reads: 'Power will be off on Sunday due to maintenance work. Consumers are requested to cooperate and not blame us. Inconvenience is regretted. The areas affected are near the old bus stand and some other places. Supply will resume after work is over.' The shutdown is actually on Sunday, 14 July, from 06:00 to 12:00, and will affect feeders 3 and 5 serving Gandhi Nagar, Nehru Colony, and the bus stand area. The notice must be published in English and should be suitable for a newspaper and the department's notice board. The assistant argues that the draft is short and therefore clear. The executive engineer has received complaints that earlier notices were vague and that the public blamed the department for a nine-hour outage. The department's communication policy requires a date, time, affected area, reason, helpline number, and an apology in a formal register.
1. Identify three specific weaknesses in the draft and explain the practical problem each creates.
Read the worked answer
First, it gives no calendar date or exact duration: 'Sunday' and 'after work is over' are not actionable, so consumers cannot plan and may treat a six-hour outage as a nine-hour one. Second, it does not list feeders or areas precisely: 'near the old bus stand and some other places' excludes Gandhi Nagar and Nehru Colony and invites complaints from people who were not warned. Third, the tone is defensive and vague: 'not blame us' and 'inconvenience is regretted' without a helpline or reason sound like the department is avoiding accountability. A fourth issue is register: 'Power will be off' is conversational for a public notice.
The practical consequence is more calls to the control room, avoidable public anger, and a repeat of the earlier complaint about vague notices.
2. Rewrite the notice in 50-70 words in a formal, factual register.
Read the worked answer
Notice: Planned power shutdown. On Sunday, 14 July, from 06:00 to 12:00, supply will be interrupted on feeders 3 and 5 for maintenance. Affected areas: Gandhi Nagar, Nehru Colony, and the old bus stand area. Consumers are requested to plan accordingly. For assistance, call the divisional helpline at 1912. The department regrets the inconvenience.
3. Explain one grammatical or stylistic choice you made and why it suits an official notice.
Read the worked answer
I used the passive 'supply will be interrupted' rather than 'we will cut power'. The passive keeps the focus on the event and the affected area, avoids an accusatory tone, and is standard in official notices. I also used 'consumers are requested to plan accordingly' instead of 'do not blame us'; the former is polite and gives the reader an action, while the latter is defensive and invites conflict. The date, time, feeders, and helpline are front-loaded so a reader scanning the notice gets the actionable facts first. The apology is kept to one short sentence because a long apology weakens the factual message.