A 212-word essay-instead-of-letter script under a 4/3/2/1 rubric
In a 10-mark composition test, students must write a letter to the headmaster asking permission to open an Arabic literary club. The instructions specify 120–150 words and give 4 marks for format, 3 for content, 2 for language, and 1 for register. One script runs to 212 words, begins «أَكْتُبُ هَذَا الْمَقَالَ لِأُبَيِّنَ...», uses «أَنْتَ» when addressing the headmaster, has no date or address, and ends with «وَالسَّلَامُ عَلَيْكُمْ» only. Another script has 118 words but includes the date, the address, a formal salutation, a clear request, and a polite closing. The class has been drilled on essay introductions but not on formal letters. The teacher must return both scripts tomorrow and decide which is closer to full marks.
1. Which script is closer to full marks, and why?
Read the worked answer
Closer to full marks: the 118-word script. The rubric is weighted toward the genre: 4 marks for format and 1 for register, versus 3 for content and 2 for language. The shorter script secures the format marks (date, address, salutation, closing) and the register mark (polite address to a superior), and its content is clear. Its only weakness is falling 2 words below the stated range, which is not a separate rubric category and should be noted as a revision point, not treated as a genre failure.
Why the 212-word script loses. It may have fuller content, but it opens like an essay («أكتب هذا المقال»), uses «أنت» to the headmaster, and omits the address/date. Under this rubric it can lose most of the 4 format marks and the register mark before content is even considered. Length alone does not earn marks; the extra words do not compensate for the wrong genre.
Principle. Mark the task that was set, not the amount of writing.
2. Rewrite the opening and closing of the first script in appropriate Arabic letter style, and explain the changes.
Read the worked answer
Opening rewrite. «سَيِّدِي مُدِيرَ الْمَدْرَسَةِ الْمُحْتَرَمَ، تَحِيَّةً طَيِّبَةً وَبَعْدُ، أَتَشَرَّفُ بِأَنْ أَطْلُبَ مِنْ سِيَادَتِكُمْ الْإِذْنَ بِتَأْسِيسِ نَادٍ أَدَبِيٍّ عَرَبِيٍّ فِي الْمَدْرَسَةِ...»
Closing rewrite. «وَلَكُمْ مِنِّي فَائِقُ الشُّكْرِ وَالِاحْتِرَامِ، التِّلْمِيذُ: [الاسم] الصَّفُّ: [الصف]»
Why.
- «أكتب هذا المقال» announces an essay; a letter opens with a salutation and a direct request.
- «سيادتكم» and «المحترم» establish formal register; «أنت» is too familiar for a headmaster.
- The date and address belong in the letter frame; the closing should include a polite formula and the sender’s name/class.
- «والسلام عليكم» is not wrong as a greeting, but alone it is too abrupt and does not replace the formal closing required by the format mark.
3. How would you mark the 212-word script on the 1-mark register criterion and on the stated word limit?
Read the worked answer
Register mark. 0/1. The essay opening and «أنت» break the required formal relationship, regardless of grammatical accuracy.
Length. The rubric has no separate length mark, so do not invent one. However, the 212-word script is 62 words over the stated range; in the comment, ask the student to cut repetition and keep the request, reasons, and closing. If the board’s general instructions impose a penalty for ignoring the word limit, apply it transparently and consistently to all scripts; otherwise, do not deduct under «language» for length alone.
Suggested mark for the 212-word script. Format 1/4 (some letter features, but wrong opening and missing date/address), content 3/3 (clear request and reasons), language 2/2 (accurate), register 0/1 = 6/10. The comment should say: «Your content is strong; your genre and register are not. Rewrite the frame, not the ideas.» This separates the student’s real strength from the rubric failure.