Tone and Word Choice
Write for the reader in front of you
Tone questions ask: given this audience and this purpose, which version sounds right? Judge with three tests - courtesy, clarity, and appropriateness.
Audience and formality. A message to a customer or an executive is formal: no slang, no exclamation marks, no emoji, and contractions used sparingly. A note to a close colleague can be relaxed but still professional. When in doubt, err formal.
Courtesy and the "you" attitude. Keep the reader's interests in the foreground and avoid language that assigns blame. You failed to return the form accuses; The form has not yet reached our office simply describes. Frame restrictions positively where honesty allows: Orders placed after 3 p.m. ship the next business day rather than We can't ship your order today.
Active voice and concrete words. The committee approved the budget is clearer than The budget was approved. Prefer specific nouns and strong verbs to abstract ones: We cut response time by two days beats We effected an improvement in responsiveness.
Avoid both extremes. Too casual (Hey guys, quick heads-up) damages credibility in formal writing; too stiff (Pursuant to the aforementioned directive) buries the point. Jargon, clichés, and euphemism (downsizing when you mean layoffs) all cost clarity.
Worked example: Per your request, I am endeavoring to ascertain whether the shipment has been dispatched becomes As you requested, I am checking whether your order has shipped. Same facts, half the words, twice the courtesy.
Rule of thumb: read the sentence as the recipient. If you would feel accused, confused, or talked down to, rewrite it.